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HOUSMAIL HM101 29
March 2003 ESCAPING FROM
THE PORN TRAP THE
NEED FOR THIS PAPER? Recent
surveys have claimed that as many as ONE IN FIVE male Church members admit
giving in to temptation to visit sexually oriented Web Sites on the Internet! "Let no one deceive you with empty words,
for it is because of these things that the wrath of God comes upon the sons
of disobedience." (Ephesians 5:6) This
paper has been written to present an overall summary of the Biblical answer
to OVERCOMING TEMPTATION. It was triggered by recent requests for help to
overcome the temptation to view PORNOGRAPHY. It is NOT the "last
word" on the subject, but it should provide a foundation on which to
begin. It
is directed specifically to those who have requested for help with
heterosexual porn. Of course Porn can also include many other kinds of sexual
depravity, including Homosexuality. Also, the principles discussed here are
not limited to Porn. They are equally applicable to ALL other forms of
temptation to SIN of every kind. ALL SIN is equally as bad in God's sight,
and at the Judgement, without adequate repentance, they all lead to the same
awful fate -- ETERNAL DEATH. DO
YOU REALLY BELIEVE VICTORY IS POSSIBLE? Of
course it is! You wouldn't be feeling so guilty -- you wouldn't be crying out
for help -- if you didn't believe that! If you begin to doubt it, you will
not have the single minded FAITH you will need to receive God's answer to
your prayers. (James 1:5-8) The
Bible both COMMANDS and PROMISES it -- but YOU will have to get serious about
following the directions! WHO
WILL HELP? It
is VERY important that you recognise your own spiritual poverty, (Matthew 5:3) and that you direct
your cries for help to the right place! You
asked US to help! Please don't misunderstand this next point. It is NOT
"rejection". It is NOT wrong to seek encouragement and counsel from
other Christian brothers. But that is NOT ENOUGH. I am only a messenger --
and the MOST IMPORTANT thing I can say to you, is that you MUST learn how to
REDIRECT the focus of your prayers to THE ONLY TRUE GOD -- The Father of
Jesus -- and OUR Father in Heaven. He has delegated ALL power to help those
who realise their need, to Jesus. (Matthew 28:18,
Philippians 2:9-12) The Bible makes the
claim that there is NO OTHER way to find God, except through Jesus. (Luke 10:22, John 14:6, Acts 4:12) It
is YOUR personal responsibility to check out the Bible quotes in this paper
for yourself, to make sure that what you are hearing is not just from men --
but DIRECT from the Word of GOD to YOU! And when you are convinced of that,
it is also YOUR personal responsibility to choose for yourself to follow
Jesus as LORD of ALL your life. No one else can do that for you. ADDICTION
OR SIN? From
various testimonies received, it seems likely that for many, PORN may be as
MENTALLY ADDICTIVE as some the most dangerous hard drugs! I
do not know whether that is true or not -- but I do know that addiction is
NEVER a Biblical excuse for SIN! Viewed
Biblically, addiction is a severe form of SLAVERY. (Romans 6:16) It is a SYMPTOM of
the worst effects of yielding to temptation. The Bible deals with it at that
level -- the only Biblical way to break addiction, is to overcome the
temptation to SIN, which has resulted in addiction. What
Jesus offers is more powerful than any addiction! At its roots, failure to
break free from enslavement to ANY sinful habit, is the result of not wanting
ENOUGH, what Jesus offers in its place! There
is no «instant breakfast» short answer to your question. This rather lengthy
reply has been composed to help you make a beginning. However it is important
to emphasise that it is no more than that -- a starting point. The final
answer is going to take a full measure of that «Fruit of the Holy Spirit»,
which the Apostle Paul calls «self-control»,
(Galatians 5:22-23) and another one which
Peter calls «steadfastness»! (2 Peter 1:6) IMPORTANT! There
are LOTS of Bible quotations in this paper. They are there for a purpose.
Open your Bible and READ every one of them for yourself! Read them carefully
until they are fixed in your mind. THAT IS PART OF THE "CURE" YOU SEEK! This
isn't going to help at all if you don't "take the medicine"! THE
BOTTOM LINE FIRST! Let's
start with the bottom line! The
answer you say you want, is going to be all about the QUALITY of your
relationship with God and His Son! And
that is going to depend on whether or not you are searching for God with ALL
YOUR HEART! (Jeremiah 29:13) QUESTIONS
UP FRONT There
are some "up front" questions which need to be addressed. They
might be dismissed by some as merely "technical". They are NOT!
Don't listen to those who try to minimise their importance. They are about
the FOUNDATION on which your Christianity is built. The Bible says that only
a "house" built on the correct foundation can survive the inevitable
"floods". (Matthew 7:24-27, Luke
6:46-49) The foundation includes EVERYTHING Jesus said
-- about who God is; who Jesus is; what Jesus promises to His followers; and
what He commands us to do. You
need them ALL to find the victory over temptation, which you say you want.
*
The one about the
future KINGDOM OF GOD ON EARTH? *
With Jesus as the King
(Messiah) -- as prophesied in the Old Testament? *
In which you can only
receive a share, by becoming properly related to Jesus in a REAL
"Believer's Baptism". *
In which you can only
participate by receiving an IMMORTAL BODY at the Resurrection when Jesus
returns from Heaven.
Has
this led you to REPENTANCE? (Changing your way of life?)
WHY
ARE THESE MATTERS SO ESSENTIAL? The
Bible says that ONLY those who believe them correctly, and act on what they
believe, will have the sort of FAITH that is required to truly overcome «the
world». (1 John 5:1-5) Others will remain SLAVES to their sins
and the penalty of DEATH at the Judgment! PRACTICAL
THINGS TO DO The
rest of what follows makes the unlikely assumption that you might have ALL of
the above foundation properly sorted out! In today's confused "Church
scene" it is most unlikely that you do! That is NOT said to put you
down! It is simply facing «average reality» for the «average» Church person I
encounter, who has healthy feelings of good old fashioned
"CONVICTION" and "GUILT” and is desperately asking for the
"secret" of VICTORY over Temptation. You
will need to work at getting the foundation right, as well as repenting of
your sin, and overcoming temptation. You need them ALL in balance together! MOTIVATION
TO LOVE GOD God
gives us FOUR main motives to love him.
However
on its own, this fear will not be enough! It is only the starting point from
which the next THREE develop! The goal of mature faith in Jesus is that we
must grow to the point where FEAR is replaced by LOVE! (1 John 4:16-18)
Is
THAT your Christian hope? Do you want that? Do you want it enough to repent
and give up your sin?
All that awful suffering was FOR YOU! Does
the thought of what that means to you, personally, touch your heart? If
it does, then, and only then, you will begin to love Jesus
enough to want to obey Him.
Think
about that incredible offer! God and His Son will "take up
residence" in our human bodies! The
more we get to know about Jesus; and the more we succeed in obedience, the
greater the INNER PEACE we experience -- and the greater this fourth
incentive becomes! (Matthew 11:28-30) THE
PLACE OF SELF CONTROL For
ALL temptation, FOR EVERY SORT OF SIN, the only real Bible answer is your own
PERSONAL LOVE for Jesus, combined with SELF CONTROL, and PERSEVERANCE --
until you OVERCOME! SELF
CONTROL is listed amongst the "fruit of the Holy Spirit", (Galatians 5:22-23) which is given to
those who are committed to LOVE JESUS and OBEY JESUS. Here
are some suggestions that you will have to come to grips with, BETWEEN YOU
AND JESUS ALONE. No third party can help you with these, because at the end
of the day, it comes down to what is in YOUR OWN heart!
The
BIBLE is the ONLY place you will find the PURE things you are going to need
to feed into your mind, in order to displace and shut out the impure things
already there. (Philippians 4:8) If
you are unwilling to get into regular personal Bible reading and study, you
don't really mean business with God!
That
is where you need to be headed!
"If you
love me, you WILL keep my commandments". (John 14:15,21,23-24)
When
you do love Him ENOUGH -- more than the sin -- you WILL obey!
IS
VICTORY TOO HARD? The Bible says NO! Don't
ever listen to anyone who says otherwise -- especially those who try to tell
you that your human nature, makes victory impossible! Alas
there are too many so called "Christians" around who have invented
un-biblical "theological EXCUSES", for their SIN! In the parable
told by Jesus, they are the "birds of the air", (agents of
"the devil") trying to devour the Gospel seed before it takes root!
(Luke 8:5, Luke 8:12) The
Bible says that GOD will not allow you to be tempted beyond your ability.
There will ALWAYS be a way out! (1 Corinthians 10:13) Most
often the "way out" that God provides, is to simply say
"NO"! Alas
..... Most people don't want to hear that answer! Paul
also encourages us to RUN AWAY from the scene where the temptation is
encountered!
More
prayer for Divine Wisdom about what that means! And more prayerful reading of
the Bible to get that prayer answered!
Have
you read the parable of «The Ten Virgins»?
(Matthew 25:1-13) The time to act is
NOW! If you arrive at the Judgement without a purified heart, it will be too
late to do anything about it.
IT IS NOT! IT IS ABOUT REAL FAITH! IT IS ABOUT THE SORT OF FAITH THAT BELIEVES
JESUS MEANS EXACTLY
James
says that faith without works is NOT faith at all! (James 2:20-26)
IT IS NOT! IT IS ABOUT REAL
"GRACE"! Paul
says that "Grace" comes complete with a "training package"
in Godliness! (Titus 2:12-14)
Reject the training, and you also reject the rest of the Grace that offers
it!
These
things bury thoughts in your mind which will come back as temptation. The
stakes are very high -- If necessary change your friends! Or do you like your
friends, more than Jesus? -- Enough to be sentenced to Eternal Death with
them on Judgement day? THAT would be really "dumb" wouldn't it? Q.
WHAT HAPPENS IF WE FAIL SOMETIMES? A.
We confess our sin, seek forgiveness -- and keep going until the victory is
won! "I will not let you go unless you bless me". (Genesis 32:26) WHAT
GOD REALLY WANTS "My little children, these things write I
unto you, that ye sin not." (1 John 2:1) BUT
IF WE DO SIN "If any man sin, we have an advocate with
the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous". (same verse) AND
PAUL SAYS: "Forgetting those things which are behind,
and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the
mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus." (Philippians 3:13-14) THE
PLACE OF MEMORISED SCRIPTURE "Man shall not live by bread alone, but by
EVERY word that proceeds from the mouth of God!" For
EVERY temptation, Jesus was able to call to mind something that He had
previously read in the Scriptures. That is how it became fixed in His heart
and mind, so that it could be recalled when He needed it! THAT was one of the
major sources of His victory. It is also available to YOU -- but you do have
to read it first before it can be in your mind to be recalled when you need
it. And
REMEMBER, just memorising Bible verses isn't the total answer! You have to
WANT to do something with what you remember! Jesus
was first and foremost A REAL MAN who loved and worshipped the ONE TRUE GOD
-- His Father! (John 17:3) He
was always obedient to what He calls the "first and greatest commandment of
all".
Avoid
like you would the Devil, any suggestion that you can only be helped by
someone who has already "been there” and found their way out! THAT
is altogether the WRONG answer! It is one of the LIES told by the modern
"pseudo-psychology" which has invaded the Church! Especially
avoid the pitfall of rejecting people you "feel" might be pointing
the finger at you to make you feel guilty! Instead learn to thank God for HIS
"messengers" sent to disturb your conscience, in order to motivate
you to do something about your problem -- until you find the PEACE which is
promised to truly repentant hearts! In
any case, it isn't really important whether or not you are right, when you
"feel" someone might be pointing the finger at you. Even if that
were true (which it often isn't) it is a side track! the REAL questions are: HOW DOES GOD "FEEL" ABOUT
YOUR SIN? Knowing
the "dark secrets" of others who might have "been there",
will not help at all! All sins are the same in their effect on those who
commit them! Unrepented, they lead to DEATH at the Judgement! Unrepented,
they separate us from God in this life! In this lost world of ours, few have
found THE ANSWER! There are many more still living unrepentant in their own
"special" brand of sin, than there are victorious over it -- or
even seeking victory! JESUS
HAS NEVER BEEN "THERE"! Never
forget that He is a REAL MAN, exactly like us. (Hebrews
2:14-16) He has been "tempted in all points like us". BUT HE NEVER SINNED! (Hebrews 4:15) And it is because of that
victory that He, better
than any other man, knows how to teach US to overcome, just as He
did! JESUS
is the ONLY ONE who can get you through this! (Matthew
11:27-30) "Whoever comes to me I will never turn
away". (John 6:37 NEB) Learn
to go to HIM, and to His Father, as often as you are tempted. Learn to go
quickly, before the pressures of temptation build up! Learn how to replace
impure thoughts with pure, before you give in to FANTASY, and they become
SIN. THE
"DOWNSIDE" OF PORN Quite
apart from escaping from what is going to happen to the unrepentant on
Judgment Day, there are other practical things for the HERE AND NOW. Contrary
to what many people say (even some so called "Christians" these
days!) PORN is NOT a "victimless" crime! The
girls who are persuaded to expose their naked bodies to be photographed for
the lustful eyes of men with twisted minds, are both sinners, and VICTIMS of
the predators who make their money from the porn! The
wives of the married, are VICTIMS of the sin of their husbands! And
the future wives of the single, are VICTIMS of the sin of their future
husbands! Here
is one VERY important practical issue, which most people don't take the time
to think through. Jesus
says that the mental attitude which fantasizes about sex, is the same as
actually committing the sin! (Matthew 5:27-28) Are
you married? Viewing Porn commits ADULTERY against your wife! It will place a
huge emotional barrier between a man and his wife. Save yourself for your
wife alone. That is part of the marriage covenant! Are
you single? Viewing Porn commits FORNICATION, which, so far as God is
concerned, is exactly the same as having sex with a PROSTITUTE! Save
yourself for the girl you will eventually marry! If
you become addicted to Porn, it will distort how you think about sex! And it
will seriously affect your prospects of the very best emotional relationship
with your future wife. No
girl deserves to be saddled with a husband like that! CLEANSING
THE MIND Only
real repentance, and the forgiveness that follows, can cleanse the mind to
undo all the bad things that get buried there when this sin is committed. BACK
AT THE BOTTOM LINE So here
we are at the "Bottom Line" again! This
"epistle" has been directed specifically at PORN. However the
"secret" of overcoming temptation of all sorts is much the same.
The name of the sin may change, but what we need to do about it is just about
the same in all cases.
But
those are only a starting point. After that, it all comes down to the quality
of your relationship WITH GOD and His SON! Don't ever try to settle for less
than the absolute best! Don't
ever let family, or peer group pressures, or your "feelings" about
the motives of others, get in the way of that! Don't
despair. Don't ever give up until you win. The Bible does promise victory to
those who seek God's help to keep trying until they win. Cling
to God. Learn to pray "The Prayer of Jacob"-- "I will not
let you go unless you bless me." It is possible! Jesus COMMANDS it -- and Jesus PROMISES it! Allon |